A Horse-Sized Duck

Isabel Wiesner

Isabella Wiesner

Have you ever seen a horse-sized duck? No? That’s because they don’t exist. But just because these majestic creatures aren’t real doesn’t mean we can’t have a heated debate about whether one would win in a fight against ten duck-sized horses.

Take a minute to imagine a duck. The way they waddle around might seem cute at first, but now take a look at this image of a duck’s mouth.

Just look at those teeth! It’s terrifying, and that’s just on a normal-sized duck. Try and envision those needle-like teeth and that weird spiky tongue on a duck the size of a horse. It’s quite frankly the stuff of nightmares.

It’s quite frankly the stuff of nightmares.”

But we can’t base this debate on fear factor alone, so let’s take a minute to examine this creature’s possible fighting tactics.

First of all, that giant beak and mouth of teeth could do some serious damage to those puny duck-sized horses. A regular horse and a regular duck can both bite pretty hard already, and I’m sure that if they were combined into one terrifying creature, then it would be able to inflict a lot more damage.

On top of this, a horse-sized duck would have massive webbed feet, which could easily crush its tiny horse adversaries. Heck, this giant duck would only need to roll over and it could demolish all ten of those duck-sized horses in an avalanche of feathers and fury.

I think we can all agree to thank our lucky stars that a horse-sized duck doesn’t actually exist, because let’s be honest — those duck-sized horses don’t stand a chance.