The following is a recap of the most recent episode of ABC’s “The Bachelor”.  All opinions stated in this piece are that of the author’s.

Who knew that karma could come back and bite you in as few as five episodes? 

Clearly not ‘Queen Victoria’. Bachelor Matt James finally had enough of the producers keeping her on the show, and thankfully, the Queen has fallen. 

If you are not caught up with the last five weeks of Bachelor drama, I will be releasing a full report covering the ups and downs of what you’ve missed soon. I will reassure you, however, this season is as drama-filled as ever; my family and I tuned in at 7 pm and you could practically feel the tension through the TV. 

Rose Ceremony:

The beginning of the episode opens with everyone at the cocktail party. People are freaking out everywhere the cameras turn. Matt has been informed of the rumors crazy Anna spread about Brittany being an escort in Chicago—and he is not pleased with it. Poor guy just wants to find a great gal, but instead, he’s stuck with a few crazy ladies creating middle school drama. 

Instead of a lighthearted toast or a classic ‘Matt James opening prayer’,—so wholesome, love him—it’s more of a confrontation about how lying and jealousy are not qualities he is looking for in a wife. #tea.

Anna is pulled aside, and she literally just cracks. Right away. She pathetically tries to defend herself, but then just admits to the rumors she spread and blabbers about how out of character it is for her. While Matt is understanding, telling her that “everyone does things they regret”, he ultimately gives her the boot and walks her to the door. That girl was never going to last anyway. Since night one she’s been a little too much to handle and lowkey crazy. You could see it in her eyes. 

Next up on the chopping board is Queen Victoria. It is brought to Matt’s attention that Victoria was calling girls in the house names that will not be referenced in this article due to profanity. Again, #tea.

Victoria proceeds to have a complete meltdown: in her words, “I am trying to be positive, but I will die”. Matt, at this point, is kind of over it. He cancels the rest of the cocktail party and goes straight to the rose ceremony. 

Victoria is still outside, openly yelling about how everyone else there is dumb, unfit for love, and how she is the only perfect girl there. I am seriously confused as to how this girl is not an actor—like, there is no way. At least now she’s Instagram famous. 

Rose ceremony happens and…oh no! No rose for Queen Victoria, as expected. And, needless to say, she descends her throne with anything but dignity and grace. Instead, it was more of a tantrum with a few targeted remarks regarding Matt’s poor decision making. Nice, Victoria, that’ll get him. Not. 

Another quote, “I’m still Queen but Matt is not my King”— and I’m still waiting to hear what her real job is. Guess we’ll never know. 

First One-on-One:

Probably one of my favorite One-on-Ones ever. I love Rachael. I love Matt. Love Rachael and Matt together. Top choice at the moment. 

When Racheal’s name is read off the date card, she practically breaks into tears. She is so modest, and you can tell she’s just trying to not freak out. She gets picked up in a limo and meets Matt at a giant fitting room area lined with racks of designer clothing. There is just an evidently good energy between the two. It seems really natural—at least as natural as The Bachelor can be. 

Rachael is then taken back to model a ton of glamorous dresses for Matt. His reaction when Rachael walks out…oh my gosh, butterflies. Literally, if someone doesn’t look at me like that when I try on dresses, then I’m quitting. 

After the fashion show is over, Matt gifts her a new pair of Louboutin heels, and it almost brings Rachael to tears again. She is so shocked as she claims to not deserve them; she tells him that no one ever cared enough to buy her anything so nice. 

Rachael walks into the hotel with ten new bags of clothes, and just when the other girls didn’t think they could get any more jealous, the limo driver gives Rachael a box from Matt with a new gown to wear to dinner.

At the dinner, Rachael reveals to Matt why she’s never been in love before and how she’s never had enough confidence in herself to even feel loved by someone else—so relatable. Ah, oh my gosh, they both tell each other that they are falling in love with each other. I even started blushing. Cutest moment ever. 10/10 date. 

She obviously gets the rose. Rachael and Matt are literal endgame, change my mind.

Group Date: 

This was an interesting one; I was a little confused by the main point of this date. Matt surprises the group with a trip to a farm. There is some manual labor for a second, then they cut to a clip of them all potentially having to milk a goat, and then all of a sudden there is an egg toss—yea, kind of all over the place. Little awkward considering Rachael just had a full-on shopping day and was gifted Louboutins while the others were shoveling horse manure. All the girls are stressing that they won’t get enough time with Matt, and they begin to wonder if they can handle having a boyfriend with 20 different girlfriends. Classic worries and drama, a typical occurrence on The Bachelor. 

At the cocktail party, Matt pulls MJ aside to address the way she maliciously bullied the new girls. For context, she literally labeled the house of girls by saying the OG’s were Varsity and the new girls were JV. When Matt asks her if these rumors are true, she straight-up lies to his face, acting as if it was all a false judgment of character. Not good. You could see the calculated rage on MJ’s face when Matt mentions that it was Katie who had tattled on her the previous night. 

It soon cuts to MJ and Jessenia arguing about how MJ lied to Matt and has been fueling the divide in the house. MJ clearly can’t handle the heat and begins barking at poor Jessenia, claiming she was attacking her. We all know who’s really in the wrong though; I mean, lying to Matt isn’t really going to get you anywhere, MJ.

In the end, Matt awards Abigail the group date rose. I actually really like Abigail. There’s a slightly off-putting moment in this episode where she complained about not getting time with Matt, but literally everyone does that. 

Abigail gets pretty emotional; she opens up about her struggles with being deaf and how it has caused people to leave her. She and Matt really connect, reassuring each other that they both have feelings for the other. 

Giving this date a 6/10. The farm theme was a little random, but kinda cute and earthy. The drama was kind of all over the place so that deducts a few points – couldn’t really follow it all. Loved the Abigail and Matt moment though. 

Second One-on-One: 

I personally love Kit. Don’t really think that she is the best fit for Matt, but obsessed with the fact that she is Cynthia Rowley’s daughter. My mom was Kate Spade’s personal assistant and kinda ran in that crowd with Cynthia Rowley in the early 2000s, so we get so intrigued whenever Kit gets screen time.

I thought the date idea was cute. I guess Kit once mentioned how she loves cooking with her mom, and so Matt thought it would be cute if they made cookies and had a lowkey night. She opens up about growing up in the spotlight which caused her to build up some walls when it came to love. Not going to lie, when she mentioned growing up with gold Bentleys and red carpets, I was jealous. I was kind of expecting her to bring up how growing up with a famous mom wasn’t as glamorous as people thought—I feel like that is a classic convo that famous people have. Completely understandable though. 

Kit receives the rose from Matt, and now, I’m excited to see how things go for her in the upcoming weeks. I’d give this date a 7/10. It was super sweet and thoughtful—but compared to Rachael’s glamour day it seemed a little lacking.  

Ending: 

“Big hair, big hoops, big energy”—MJ couldn’t have said it better. 

The big ending left my parents and me yelling at the TV with MJ and Jessenia arguing on opposite sofas about who was in the wrong. There is absolutely no question that MJ is the villain in this scenario. She literally lied to Matt, saying she wasn’t behind the bullying in the house, and now she’s dragged other girls into this mess. Poor Jessenia is the victim here; she’s just trying to defend herself and everyone else in the house who doesn’t want MJ to get away with her lies. 

MJ can try and act all tough and try to make her hair as big as her lies, but we all know the truth, and next week Matt will too.